hot topic

The topic of ways parents discipline children is a controversial one. Normally I do not write a blog unless I am pretty sturdy in my stance, but I am a little back and forth on this one. 

On the news this morning, a woman who was on Dr. Phil's "Help me control my kids" episode has been charged with child abuse by showing a home video of herself using hot sauce and a cold shower to discipline her children. People were fuming saying that this was abusive, torture and that she should go to jail. The woman is now regretting going public about her private disciplining methods never thinking it would come to this. The government is even thinking about taking away her children who are adopted!

Yesterday, I watched a Desperate Housewives episode that showed Bri babysitting Lynette's children and spanking them. Lynette was furious that Bri spanked her children proclaiming "We don't believe in hitting our children." Yet, Lynette will use a spanking threat - but never actually does it. I would argue this is the same thing as actually spanking.

Moreover, friends of ours came over recently. Their child was in t-ball and they were upset with the new rule of not keeping score. "Everybody wins" is what the coaches want and they couldn't believe how many parents backed this. 

I think we are protecting our children far too much. I do believe that spanking or other forms of discipline out of anger should be considered abusive. However, if the parent is calm and believes strongly in their forms of discipline, I say "leave them alone!" Really, jail for hot sauce? 

My husband would have to pull weeds when he got in trouble. This is probably considered abusive now...oh such torture. I probably shouldn't have said anything. Child Services is going to go looking for my mother-in-law.

In the olden days, you would have been casted out if you didn't spank whether it be with a belt or hand. I know plenty of people that were spanked as children and have turned out just fine. 

Does this mean I can go to jail for the times Audrey fell off the couch? Pretty soon, parents won't be allowed to say "no" to their children. We will need to say things like "Please don't do that." Putting them in time out will be considered psychologically damaging.

I just think we are pushing this a little too far. If they are not seriously hurting the child and/or not using their discipline with anger, than I say "let it be." Parents have the freedom to parent how they see fit. 

How will our children learn about right and wrong or winning and losing if we don't allow score keeping at baseball games or refuse to show discipline?


attached to the hip

It seems like just a minute ago I was waiting for Audrey to show signs of really wanting mommy. She had just started reaching for Daddy and me and muttering "Da Da."

Audrey has always been around other people and has been babysat since a very young age. I figured doing that was the recipe for having a social child that didn't suffer from separation anxiety. 

But I was wrong and now have a baby who is screaming for me, yelling for hours when I leave her, clawing and climbing over people to get to me and I can hear "ma ma" in her cries.

She won't even go to her Dad and I am frightened at how long this will last. While I was dropping her off in the church nursery yesterday (she actually didn't cry), I saw mothers with 3-year-olds to 5-year-olds having to deal with separation anxiety. Ah!

I don't know what to do, so I am relying on you moms to tell me. 


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